Reflection on Self-Awareness
On a clear evening, the moonlight was bright and pure, dressed in simple, light garments, I leisurely sat in a rocking chair.
The music flowed like water, and pages turned between my fingers, blossoming into a small, refreshing tranquility within the quiet space.
I've always cherished this state of stillness, neither sad nor joyful. Like a lotus flower beside a Buddha's lamp, serene yet not lonely.
I knew I wasn't one destined for a Buddhist connection, and I've always struggled to understand the vastness of the mortal world,
I knew, regardless of the hardships I faced, I would never seek refuge with the Buddha. That unwavering conviction,
I occasionally listen to Buddha-speaking statues, without greed, without attachment, without resentment or regret, letting go of worldly thoughts and maintaining benevolent intentions within my heart,
I know that the teachings in those ancient, yellowing scriptures – teaching the way through ordinary streets and every household's hearth – have already spread throughout the world,
Like me, with a yearning for seclusion, I often find myself pulled back into the allure of the world, unable to truly let go and find peace,
Sensitive and prone to pain, I often regard the transcendent sages with a cautious and reverent gaze,
I knew, deep within my heart, that little trace of earthly desire would occasionally surface, causing me to be frustrated and dissatisfied without spiritual solace,
I knew I lacked the ability to truly contemplate and observe with stillness, being idle and dispersed, lacking cunning, and preferring to keep a distance, which is what brings me peace,
I knew no one could patiently appreciate my unique charm. So, amidst loneliness, I became increasingly sharp and my soul gradually detached from my initial self,
Life, like a distorted flower blooming in the darkness, always yearns for the warmth of the sun,
Perhaps, like me, those living in confusion and uncertainty will not have the power to save the world,
And therefore, they will never be guided by the spirit of enlightened beings, instantly shedding the burdens of the world and ascending to become immortals,
I think, someone as dull as me can only do is to sit in silent contemplation of Buddha statues, to smile while plucking flowers, and to harbor compassion, to maintain steadfast faith,
Using the vast expanse of the world as a humble dwelling and mountains and rivers as my brushes and pens, I write with the remaining trace of my compassionate Buddhist heart within the red dust of the world!
Illustration/Network
