The Elder Says: Spaciousness in the Heart, Like a Boat Across the River; Constant Willingness to Aid Others
People live in society, they must interact with others and have various connections with the outside world, therefore, it is very important to establish harmonious interpersonal relationships. To establish harmonious interpersonal relationships, the most important thing is to be tolerant and willing to accept people who are different from oneself in terms of interests and style. The ancients said:Sea in rivers, tolerance is great; Wall-standing ten times, no desire is arrogant;.
Tolerance is a noble moral quality, a 'prime minister's generosity', a 'general's demeanor'. You must have a clear conscience, tolerate others, which requires us tomutual understanding, mutual concession, mutual respect, mutual love
mutual understanding means understanding and forgiving each other, not counting personal grudges. Everyone has emotions and dignity, they need others' consideration and have a responsibility to treat others with consideration. Once we have mutual understanding, we can clear our minds and remain calm in any situation, and maintain a generous character.
Mutual concession means mutual concession, not counting personal gains and losses. There is no heaven in the heart, no space for selfishness. We should consciously eliminate selfish thoughts and act in the interests of the whole. We should give benefits to others and leave difficulties for others. It is difficult to reconcile personal gains and losses when seeking fame or profit.
Mutual respect means respecting each other, not counting high or low. Respecting others is a virtue, 'respecting people is to make people respect you'. Respecting others naturally gains their goodwill and respect. If you ignore the existence of others and disrespect the dignity of others, you will not have close friends.
Mutual love means caring for each other, not counting differences in personality, qualities and appearance. Love can encompass the entire world, integrate diverse people into a whole; love can melt the ice of estrangement, eliminate the boundaries of superiority and inferiority, and make people close to each other; love can resolve contradictions and misunderstandings, eliminate jealousy, hatred and resentment, and make the world a better place.
We say that tolerance doesn't mean blindly complying, it doesn't mean agreeing with good and evil, it's about understanding and caring for each other based on the socialist moral norms, we should be more tolerant. When encountering violations of principles, we should not be lenient. This allows us to maintain a broad mind and establish pure interpersonal relationships.
During the Spring and Autumn period, King Zhuang of Chu held a banquet with his ministers. At that time, it was night, and the hall was lit with lamps. As the ministers drank happily, the lamps and candles suddenly went out. At that time, Queenie, who was beside King Zhuang, 'ah' called out. King Zhuang asked, 'What's happening?' Queenie said to King Zhuang, 'Your Majesty, someone violated me. That person, seeing the light go out, pulled my robe and broke his hat strap. He's holding it now, quickly light the lamp and catch the person with the broken strap.'
King Zhuang said, 'I rewarded everyone to drink, and they drank too much, some people will inevitably do something out of the ordinary. It's not a big deal.' He ordered the people around him to say, 'Today, I am drinking with everyone. If anyone doesn't break the strap, it means he didn't enjoy the fun. Everyone should break the strap.' One hundred and ten ministers immediately broke the straps and drank enthusiastically, having a great time.
Three years later, Chu and Jin fought. A general named Zhuang often stood in front, brave and invincible. After winning the battle, King Zhuang was surprised and asked him, 'You haven't given me any special favors, why do you work so hard in the war?' He replied, 'I'm just the person who broke the strap that night.'
The bigger your mind is, the greater things you can do; the bigger your mind is, the more charming your personality is.
During the Spring and Autumn period, Qin Mugong's good horse was slaughtered by three hundred and more farmers in the countryside. Qin officials captured them and planned to punish them severely. Qin Mugong said, 'I cannot harm three hundred people because of a horse. I heard that eating a good horse meat is not good for the body. Let them drink wine and release them.'
Later, Chu and Jin fought at Han Yuan. These three hundred people heard the news and rushed to help the Qin army. They happened to see King Mugong's chariot trapped in a siege and a dangerous situation. These farmers rushed up to fight with the Jin army to repay King Mugong's kindness of giving him a horse. The Jin army's encirclement was broken, and King Mugong finally escaped.
King Mugong's tolerance saved his life, and this 'transaction' was worth it.
During the Han Dynasty, Cheng Yi served as Prime Minister, and his driver liked to drink. Once he went out with Cheng Yi, he drank too much and threw up on Cheng Yi's car. Cheng Yi's subordinates reported that he should drive this person away. Cheng Yi heard this opinion and said, 'If we punish people for being drunk, would we treat everyone like this? Let's tolerate him this time, it's just that he stained the mat on the car.'
This driver came from the border, and he was familiar with the affairs of reporting emergencies in the border areas. Once he went out, he happened to see a rider with red and white bags galloping towards the station, so he knew that an urgent document from a border county had arrived. When he arrived in the city, this driver followed the messenger to the Public Office (Han Dynasty's office for receiving petitions from citizens, summoning officials, and escorting envoys from border counties) to inquire about the details. He learned that the enemy invaders had invaded Yunzhong and Dayuan, and immediately returned to see Cheng Yi and said, 'These places officials have been invaded by the enemy, they are old and weak, and they cannot handle military affairs. You should learn about their personnel files in advance so that the emperor can inquire about them.' Cheng Yi thought it was reasonable, so he asked the official in charge of personnel files to compile detailed materials.
Later, the emperor summoned Cheng Yi and the inspectors to inquire about the situation of the officials in charge of the enemy-invaded areas. Cheng Yi answered one by one. The Minister of Investigation was suddenly unaware of the details and could not respond, so he was scolded by the emperor.
Cheng Yi appeared to be loyal to his duty, and he constantly reported the military and political situation in the border areas. This was thanks to the driver.
People should be tolerant and allow others to make mistakes. Especially those who should make every effort. It seems that those who deliberately seek fault, pursue revenge, are so foolish.
If the leader forgives the minor mistakes of his subordinates, the subordinates will often work harder and prove their potential, and they will find opportunities to demonstrate their talents. Those who deliberately seek fault and pursue revenge, are so foolish.
